“You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’ You must do the thing you think you cannot do.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
We are often afraid of what the future might hold. At least I am. Today, I don’t feel like taking the leap and preparing for living with my husband at all. I’d rather choose stability, even though ultimately, standing still means going backwards in life.
When I look back at my life, I often tend to look at my life experiences with a level of sadness or anger. How much more will life hand me, if I’ve already been through this?
Another way of looking at it is, I’ve been through it and survived. This means I am strong. If I’ve been able to handle what I have, why won’t I be able to handle the next hurdle in life?
Another thing is, of course, that uncertainty is scary, but without taking risks, we won’t go forward, and without going forward, we slide backward. I believe I read it in this book I mentioned of poems by a rape survivor, but not sure. Wherever I read it, I read that there are generally two kinds of people in life: those who warn you about all the risks of following your dreams, and those who encourage you to take the chances that following your dreams will present you with.
I have generally been trying to stay on the safe side, not taking risks but thereby not taking chances either. A few of the chances and risks I took, have not turned out well. For example, I went to university in 2007 and fell flat on my face. Then again, does that mean that taking chances and risks is altogether bad?
I took the chance and the risk of transferring from the city institution to my current small town institution. It hasn’t been an altogether good choice, but opportunities have arosen from my taking this chance/risk too. For example, day activities are generally better here than in the city institution.
I tend to choose stability over opportunity, but maybe that needs to change a bit. I’ve gone through a lot already and survived, so doesn’t this indicate that I am strong enough to handle the future?